Hello Scorpio. Fancy seeing you here so early. You are, after all, the main event, and I’m only halfway through the Zodiac.
Before the rest of the signs get all angry at me for this—wait, never mind. Get angry, I don’t care. You all know it’s true. Everyone is interested in Scorpio. I have made hundreds of videos on each Zodiac sign, and the Scorpio descriptions are always the most viewed.
Why is this? This horrific unfairness. A perfectly divided system, unnaturally weighted in the direction of one—the Scorpion.
Let’s look into it for a moment, my beloved eighth sign. Why do I love you? And why do THEY love you even more?
Like Aries, Scorpio is ruled by Mars, the God of War. May it be in wits, or hand to hand combat, you love to battle. You love to win even more. But unlike Aries, you have an interesting asset called patience.
It could be that you’re the dark side of Mars, plotting and thinking about your next move, before you risk it all on a half-corked idea—like your brother is repeatedly doing. It could also be that you are ruled by water (not fire), holding your thoughts beneath the surface, before releasing your vengeance on those that deserve it.
It could very well be that you are not just ruled by Mars, but by Pluto as well. Pluto AKA Hades AKA the God of the Underworld. Yes, you are Hades, and we are all Persephone—pretending that we hate you, only to get severe Stockholm Syndrome, and latching on to you forever.
You think you’re so cool with your cleverly chaotic and destructively scary ways, and coincidentally, so do we. We love that about you. We’re intrigued by it. We want to know you more—not inspire of it, but because of it.
In fiction, Scorpios are known as the sex freaks. In reality, you are passionately addicted to GOOD sex. You are more about having that meaningful, loving connection with someone for eternity, then any old one night stand, or pointless fling. For you, sex gets better with time, and you are willing to evolve with one person. You will wait for them to choose you fully, and then engulf them with your prowess.
You would prefer isolation to a horrible relationship, and so you are never desperate to please, by pretending to be someone else. Loyalty is very important to you, but very hard to come by, so you don’t trust most people. In your mind, we are all guilty of deception until proven innocent, by you. Scorpio is that step up from the Libra’s shallow idea of love. You are the representation of relationships, when they get REAL.
Scorpios are highly skilled in the area of interrogation. In other words, your bullshit detector is on point, because you don’t want to waste your time with a liar, or a fraud. In fact, it would break your heart to know that someone you loved, was not who they said they were, and so you make sure that it doesn’t happen.
You will hold out for your soulmate, forever. And when you find them, you will protect them even longer. Your love only grows deeper through tough times, and in that way, it’s very hard for you to let go of the one you finally gave your heart to.
People want to know you and you want to know yourself—Hell. you already know everyone else. You’re investigators. Penetrating the walls of those closest to you, and then shocking strangers with facts about them that they’re sure they did not tell you. You’re always wondering what people are about, and then tossing them when you’ve figured it out.
Unless, of course, they intrigue you. Then the rest of the world should step back, because you’re smitten, and no one else has a chance.
Scorpio, you’re an iceberg. What we see, may be smoldering eyes, penetrating glances, and an occasional dad joke, but what is so enticing to us, is what lies beneath. And I’m guessing that is why you’re so popular.
The adventure. The intrigue. The mystery. The unconditional, mind-blowing love.
It’s probably why I married you.
It’s definitely why I love you, Scorpio.