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“Remember that the only constant in life is change” – Buddha.
It seems today everyone is telling us to embrace change and that it’ll be the best thing that ever happened to us. That the most incredible opportunities come about from hardship, in the wake of change.
And that we need to get comfortable with being uncomfortable to really evolve.
Even though evidence-based logic and thousands of incredible anecdotes show us this is true, why do so many of us face resistance when mere whispers of change are afoot?
Understanding your relationship to change is imperative, because if you’re uncomfortable with it, then you’ve probably been hiding your truth, holding onto the security blanket of illusion that’s stopping you from living your purpose.
How To Look At Change Through A New Lens
What would happen if I were to rephrase the language around change?
How different does the approach look if we decide to ‘view life through an alternative lens’, rather than ‘change everything we’ve ever known and believed’? What if we were to see it as adding another layer to our toolbox and deepening our personality traits, rather than shedding all of who we are and saying goodbye to our old self?
Perhaps looking at change as ‘attempting to create a new way of doing things’ rather than ‘reforming the old way’ is how we can healthily embrace change without the immediate visceral repulsion simply to the word. Let’s get rid of that, ‘Change? Ugggh’ shudder once and for all.
So how can you do this?
1. Think About The Emotional, Not The Logical
Look at change through the lens of the heart (visceral and emotional) rather than the head (logical and rational). Feel into why you want to change, see the outcome of what can be possible and keep focus on the desired outcome, letting the heart guide you along the way.
2. Understand it’s Natural!
Understand that change is simply transformation wearing a different mask. If we think of evolution in nature, many species undergo a metamorphosis that showcases the incredible wonders of our universe. A humble caterpillar evolving into a majestic butterfly has the pleasure of living two completely different yet equally incredible experiences.
3. Embrace the Unknown
Learn to embrace the unknown. The truth is, it’s not change that we fear, it’s the unknown. So many of us are running around, planning every moment of our lives with little to no room for error (and spontaneity!). A simple practice in embracing the unknown is to allow things to occur. We live in an over-scheduled, uber-planned existence, which has made us forget how to act in the moment and be flexible when things don’t go according to plan. Challenge yourself to become more spontaneous, embracing the unknown is like a muscle and gets easier the more it is practiced.
4. Don’t Hold Others Back
If you can’t do it for yourself, do it for others. We become who we hang around. If you are adverse to change (and inevitably, growth), you may be partially responsible for your friends and family to be operating from this place too. Do you want your kids to be faced with the same paralyzing fears as you? If your answer is a resounding no, then take the chance to lean in and let your heart guide you home to the truth of your self-expression. Chances are you’ll be glad you did and you’ll pave the way for others to do so too.
Somewhere along the way, we forgot how to listen to ourselves. We need to relearn how to trust our intuition, how to stay fully present and really hear the truth within our own heart. When you’re alone at night there is no one there to distract you, take the time to tap into your own desires and meditate on how it would feel to achieve them. Give yourself permission to align to your soul’s mission and be sure to step out of the way, allowing your greatness to flow in. It takes courage to open your heart, and I know you’re capable.
“The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance” – Alan Watts.