There’s been an awful lot in the news these days about bullying among kids, and its equally as ugly adult equivalent: Racism.
What gives? How is it that we in the modern, 21st century, in the supposedly “developed” world, are still plagued by the kind of ignorant cruelty that should have died off shortly after the woolly mammoth or the dodo bird?
It’s a sad fact of our modern world that among us roam the remnants of a dying mindset.
Those who fall victim to bullies and racists are harmed most immediately, of course. But in truth, all of us pay a price for toxic mindsets and cruelty among our planetary sisters and brothers.
As a follow-up to the podcast series on Energy Vampires
Tips to Stop a Bully
In my mind, racist behavior is just a variation of bully behavior. They may appear slightly different, but their energy signature is pretty much the same. It looks something like this: “I don’t feel good about myself, so I’ll put someone else down and feel a little better.”
On the deepest level of your being, you have the power to decide exactly who and what you want in your life. In this way, it is possible to simply make a decision to not allow any bullies or racists to “show up” in your life.
But this is much easier said than done!
The truth is, if you’ve got a racist neighbor (or customer, as was the case with waitress Toni Jenkins who received the “N-word” as a tip from a Red Lobster customer), or a bully boss, simply saying “I chose to be surrounded by kindness” every time they hassle you may not be enough.
Tip #1 – Lick or Kick?
Many years ago I had a terrible bully of a boss! I lived on an incredibly beautiful tropical island at the time, and loved my work and my lifestyle very much indeed! But this loud-mouthed so-and-so was a thorn in my side (and every else’s for that matter). I used to spend hours and hours just fuming over his obnoxious behavior and words.
Then a friend said this to me after I went on another unconstructive complaining rant: “Dawn, lick a bully and he’ll kick ya, kick a bully and he’ll lick ya.”
Wow! Changed everything.
Now I’m not telling you to go out and kick bullies – yikes, please don’t!! But what I am saying is that when we don’t let bullies intimidate us, they stop their bad behavior very quickly. After all, a bully needs a victim. When we don’t play victim the bully has to find somebody else.
This “kicking” isn’t literal, but symbolic. And it can be in the form of things like: naming their behavior, telling them you won’t tolerate them speaking to you that way, or even just saying “Stop!” when they’re rolling into one of their bully tangents.
Please though, always be sure that this is safe for you. In my case, I knew that my “bully boss” would not physically harm me or endanger me when I finally challenged his silly accusations and intimidating threats.
In fact, it worked instantly. He stopped, and better still, I finally started getting paid on time!
Tip #2 – Heal the Bully Within
“What?” you say … “I’m no bully!” Well, yes and no. By the Law of Attraction, we know that we attract only that which is a vibrational match. Now please understand, I don’t in any way mean to suggest that the victims of bullies are at fault!
What I’m suggesting here is that when we feel fear, separation, isolation or an inability to get what we want (at the core level: love and acceptance), then we are indeed a vibrational “match” to what’s really going on inside a bully.
Sure, bullying and of course, racism, are often passed down from generation to generation. Ignorance is the great big player here. But on the emotional and energetic level, this is about separation.
As we grow spiritually, we begin to understand that we are all truly ONE in the spirit of the Divine, however you call or perceive that. And when you really begin to feel and understand this oneness, this “Unity Consciousness” you know the truth of the saying:
“Whatever you do to the least of my brothers, that you do unto me.”
Also, when we feel good about ourselves – when we love and accept ourselves, “warts and all”, it’s just not possible to be cruel to others!
Now flip the coin: What does it take to be cruel to others? …
The answer? It takes two things:
1. To feel separate from them; and
2. To feel like s**t about yourself
Set Your Boundaries and Go Within
And this is exactly why I say, if you are wrangling with bullies or racists or other toxic peeps, set your boundaries first, but also go within. What can you heal within yourself in order to raise your vibration enough to no longer be a “match” to toxic people?
Let us know your thoughts on bullies, racists and other toxic folks! Leave a comment below.
