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We’ve all had those times when we question where the thoughts and feelings we’re experiencing even came from. It could be we’ve held onto anger that someone else was projecting or we’ve drudged up an old memory and we’re reliving it. Whatever the situation, it’s important in these moments to stop, take a breath and listen.
In other words, check in with yourself.
With the ridiculous number of distractions we’re surrounded by, we spend so much time “checked out” that even knowing how to tune in could seem foreign to some of us.
Understanding our own personal alignment means the difference to showing up in our authenticity compared to losing yourself and feeling confused with who you are at times. To see if you are in alignment to your soul’s truth is imperative to stop giving your power away to a belief that never belonged to you in the first place.
Before I begin to ask these very important questions, I would like to introduce you to your discernment muscles.
Your discernment is having a sense of good judgement with what is your truth and what is not your truth. The more you practice aligning to your truth, the stronger your muscles are in being an empowered participant in all areas of your life.
I’d like you to take a moment, grab your journal and ask yourself:
- How strong are my discernment muscles when it comes to honoring my intuition?
- How often do I say yes to others even when my heart says no?
- How often do I compromise my truth because I’ll feel guilty or bad?
- How often do I take on the role of people pleaser?
Please be honest with yourself, as this is the only way to move forward. There is no shame here, we’ve all been guilty to some degree.
If you answered “quite often”…
…Well, I’m really glad you’re here, reading this, because the exciting news is, there are techniques you can use today to heal patterns like this!
First I’d like you to understand why you give your power away and then we’ll look at how to awaken your discernment muscles!
Awakening Your Discernment Muscles
Keep your journal out as you’ll want to write this down.
Step 1 – Think about the different areas in your life where you compromise yourself to please others. This includes any areas where you do not put your heart’s desires first, for example: “I tend to please my tribe” or “I put my partner’s/ children’s/ family’s needs first before my own”.
Step 2 – Ask yourself; what is the value I get for me being a people pleaser in this area?
For example: “I will be accepted and loved by my tribe” or “I will feel safety in my relationships and my partner/ family won’t leave me”. Allow your writing to flow honestly, without holding back.
I want to point out that although these stories feel incredibly real, they are fabricated, based on your past wounding and my suspicion is you continually repeat this story in all of your relationships.
Step 3 – Next, close your eyes and explore the ways in which it doesn’t serve you to be a people pleaser. How does it make you feel? Where do you feel that in your body? For example: “I am not following my purpose because I fear I’ll lose my partner”. “This makes me feel scared, sad and not in control of my destiny.” “This makes my stomach churn and makes me feel nervous”.
Step 4 – Take a moment to record and reflect on what you’ve just recognized. Do you recognize that these stories have been created and woven into your reality? If you currently hold the belief that following your truth means you won’t be loved and accepted, then you’re bound to create loss, thus making it a self-fulfilling prophecy. This is precisely what causes a lack of discernment, leading to being a people pleaser.
Step 5 – A visionary exercise to release this pattern.
Now that you can recognize what’s happening, you have the ability to learn to let it go.
Ready to move beyond this old belief system? I’d like you to imagine a large, sacred fire pit burning in front of you. Energetically release into this fire your old patterns of being a people pleaser and the story you’ve woven around them. As you visualize these old beliefs being obliterated in the sacred fire, breathe in the Awakening of Discernment and feel the energy integrate through every cell of your core being. (Note: your intentions are powerful, if you believe that this won’t work, you’ll prove yourself right)
Notice the feelings that come up, and record them in your journal. This is the first step to no longer being out of alignment with your true self. When you’re ready, feel free to go through steps 1-5, looking at all areas of your life you need to pay attention to.
When you practice discernment, you honour and respect yourself, which allows you to lead by example, allowing others to do the same. This ripple effect expands beyond borders and raises the frequency of truth in the world.
Are you ready to fully Awaken your Discernment Muscles and Express your Divine Truth? Drop me a comment below and share your thoughts…